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Navigating Grief: Soaring Above the Turbulence

I am not one for window seats. As much as I love to travel, my Achilles heal has always been motion sickness. Let’s just say I always know the location of the nearest barf bag. Sitting near the window doesn’t usually help with that affliction.

But there I was, peering out the airplane window with such delight. I could not help but pause in wonder of the sapphire sky and the feathery clouds below us. My hubby squeezed my hand. You would have thought I was a kid on a ride at Disneyland.

Our destination was even better: the Big Island of Hawaii.

Shawn knows my heart for travel. He surprised me with a 5-day trip using airline miles to celebrate our first anniversary in Kona. This was a big deal for me. We had contemplated going to Hawaii for our honeymoon but it was the place I enjoyed my first honeymoon with my late husband Ericlee. A year before I wasn’t quite ready to lean into the joy and the pain of that place. I needed a new and different kind of adventure.

Now I felt eager to make new memories with Shawn. I was one year stronger. That blue sky outside the window beckoned me. The promise of ocean waves and time for rest with my love allured me.

Near the end of that flight, the tray table in front of me began to shake. Passengers grabbed for their plastic cups with jiggling ice cubes and devices sliding into their laps. The captain quickly came on over the speaker and warned us we were flying through clouds and there was a long spell of turbulence ahead. My heart sunk. My stomach dropped. I closed my eyes and tried to relax.

Those clouds that appear so beautiful when you are flying above them or looking up from the ground actually cause turbulence when you get too close. I have discovered this is the way it is with grief as well. Turbulence, you see, is normal on flights in the same way grief is an integral part of the flight of our lives.

 

Grief does not interrupt life. Grief is life.

At some point, in some way, we will experience loss. This month we have traversed many stories of grief through my friends who have contributed to this series on “Navigating Grief As Life Moves Forward.” I have learned from these stories that every journey is unique but also holds threads of familiarity to my own story of loss. Whether losing a spouse, a grandparent, a child or a mother, there is turbulence. Even in moving away from a place or a ministry we love, there is uncertainty. There is longing for something we can never quite recover here on earth.

I have survived three Aprils now – the hardest month of my year – brimming with his birthday, our wedding anniversary, and Track and Field season full of memories of coaching together through the years. April is also a month of anticipation. I remember the uncertainty we felt three years ago. I remember the stage four cancer diagnosis that came in May.

Grief creates layers of depth, compassion and grit in us. Grief forever colors the way we see the world. Grief knows the contrast of suffering and grace. Grief can also give us a special lens to see God’s glory in a more vibrant and nuanced way.

From a distance, I can see the beauty in the storm. I can trace God’s glory lighting the edges of the clouds of my life. And certainly, my plane can dip and dive through the clouds but I choose to soar higher.

I love the example of the eagle. This unique and powerful bird flies higher than most birds. The eagle uses a soaring method of flying. She spreads her long, rectangular wings for hours and only beats those wings occasionally, letting the thermals of hot air carry her to great heights. Eagles actually lean into storms and high winds to soar higher and farther.

If you are navigating grief today, I want you to know you are designed to soar. This does not mean avoiding turbulence or running from the pain of grief. Those are important parts of the journey. It does mean choosing to fly higher. It means focusing our eyes on Heaven and the Glory to come. It means renewing our hope daily in the One who strengthens us and gives us wings.

Isaiah 40:31. “…those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Don’t miss the other articles in this “Navigating Grief as Life Moves Forward” series. Feel free to SHARE with a friend who might need these words of encouragement.

The Garden – an introduction to the series

Grieving Together – an article on grieving with children

Choosing Joy – a guest post about a spouse choosing joy even on a long cancer journey

When a Grandparent Dies – a guest post about how one mom is navigating her own grief and grief with her kids

Facing Triggers and Trauma – an article about steering through grief when triggers and trauma color the journey

When You are the Caregiver – an article about navigating grief and feelings of guilt when you have a front-row seat to a loved one’s decline

When You Have to Say Goodbye to the Place Your Heart Calls Home – a guest post exploring the idea of “good grief” we experience when we are uprooted from a place or home we love

When You’ve Experienced Pregnancy Loss – a guest post sharing a first-hand experience with miscarriage and stillbirth.

Navigating Grief When Someone You Love Dies Suddenly – a guest post sharing about the sudden death of her mother.

I’m passionate about meeting people in their grief and sharing a message of hope and glory. Let’s connect through my weekly Glorygram!

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April 28, 2017 Categories: Navigating GriefTagged: behold, death, Grief, hope, struggle

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Melissa Ens says

    May 3, 2017 at 1:27 pm

    “Grief creates layers of depth, compassion and grit in us. Grief forever colors the way we see the world. Grief knows the contrast of suffering and grace. Grief can also give us a special lens to see God’s glory in a more vibrant and nuanced way.”

    I totally agree with this, Dorina. And I wonder… could the same thing be said of suffering in general? Walking with a loved one through chronic illness has me looking for redemption and I think I see it here. Other kinds of suffering create similar layers of depth, compassion, grit, and perspective – in how we see others, the world, and God. I’m encouraged to remember that.

    Thank you for hosting this series.

    Reply
    • Dorina Gilmore says

      May 3, 2017 at 4:42 pm

      Absolutely and this is what my Glory Chaser book explores… 😉

      There is that anticipatory grief that comes in walking someone through chronic illness as well. There’s so much loss along the way. I’m grateful for your participation in the series and feedback here. Love you, Friend!

      Reply
  2. Debbie says

    May 4, 2017 at 2:01 pm

    Sharing this with a friend who lost his wife a year ago–thank you, Dorina!

    Reply

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Meet Dorina

Aloha, friend! If you love stories, you are in the right place. I write about grief, glory, running, food, and more. I hope these words inspire you to chase after God’s glory in your life today!

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Before Footer

I’ve created this compassionate resource for your personal journey with grief. This book was 8 years in the making and offers a comforting, giftable resource for those who are processing their own loss, whether of a loved one, a season of life, or a dream. Breathing Through Grief includes 25 short devotionals that each focus on a different aspect of grief from my personal experience.

The journal also includes special resources such as:
•
breathing exercises
•
reflection questions
•
soul care tips
•
ample writing space
•
advice on how to talk to children about death
•
suggestions on how to approach triggers
•
creative ways to honor a loved one’s memory

If you or someone close to you is walking through loss⁠, let the comforting words in Breathing Through Grief encourage you with the knowledge that you are not alone and bring you a semblance of peace as you continue forward on the road to healing.

The book releases Nov. 14. You can pre-order today. For more information, visit www.waterbrookmultnomah.com.

View

Sep 21

Open
I’ve created this compassionate resource for your personal journey with grief. This book was 8 years in the making and offers a comforting, giftable resource for those who are processing their own loss, whether of a loved one, a season of life, or a dream. Breathing Through Grief includes 25 short devotionals that each focus on a different aspect of grief from my personal experience.
The journal also includes special resources such as:
•
breathing exercises
•
reflection questions
•
soul care tips
•
ample writing space
•
advice on how to talk to children about death
•
suggestions on how to approach triggers
•
creative ways to honor a loved one’s memory
If you or someone close to you is walking through loss⁠, let the comforting words in Breathing Through Grief encourage you with the knowledge that you are not alone and bring you a semblance of peace as you continue forward on the road to healing.
The book releases Nov. 14. You can pre-order today. For more information, visit www.waterbrookmultnomah.com.
8 1

Last week I embarked on a new adventure. My sister and I were hired as the new chefs for the Open Door Sisterhood retreat in Priest Lake, Idaho. This annual 5-day retreat is part of a year-long experience carefully curated and nurtured by podcast hosts and authors Krista Gilbert and Alexandra Kuykendall. This gathering is designed for professional communicators and business women who want to infuse the hope of Christ into their work.

As I was chopping onions and adding fragrant spices to the pot, I felt great pleasure. My heart swelled with delight as my sister and I showed a small group of women how to roll lumpia just like our Grandma Cora taught us. I experienced joy in serving up Pancit, Bibimbap bowls, Butter Chicken, Pizzelles and Pumpkin tiramisu - all the while sharing the stories of how these foods connect to my family.

I remembered one of my favorite stories in the Bible after the resurrection of Christ. Jesus appears by the Sea of Galilee where his disciples were together. The group heads out to fish, but they don’t catch anything.

The next morning Jesus is standing on the shore waiting for them. He calls out, “Friends, haven’t you any fish?”

They answer no.

He urges the to cast their nets on the right sight of the boat. The result is a catch of 153 large fish - so many that the net is torn. Jesus urges them to bring the fish for a big fish fry on the shore. “Come and have breakfast.”

None of the disciples dared ask him, “Who are you?” They knew it was the Lord. Jesus came, took the bread and gave it to them, and did the same with the fish (John 21:11-12, NIV)

We see Jesus’s joy in serving them. He takes time to make bread and prepare fish to nourish them well and then send them out. This is the power of food and sharing a meal across the table. It’s nourishment for the body and soul.

🫶🏾 Friend, what about you? Have you ever had that experience of doing something that brought you great joy and blessed others?

{Read the full reflection here: https://open.substack.com/pub/dorinaglorygram/p/follow-the-joy-set-before-you} #foodie #food #cookingtherapy #nourish #lovelanguage #powertothesisterhood #retreat @theopendoorsisterhood

View

Sep 18

Open
Last week I embarked on a new adventure. My sister and I were hired as the new chefs for the Open Door Sisterhood retreat in Priest Lake, Idaho. This annual 5-day retreat is part of a year-long experience carefully curated and nurtured by podcast hosts and authors Krista Gilbert and Alexandra Kuykendall. This gathering is designed for professional communicators and business women who want to infuse the hope of Christ into their work. 
As I was chopping onions and adding fragrant spices to the pot, I felt great pleasure. My heart swelled with delight as my sister and I showed a small group of women how to roll lumpia just like our Grandma Cora taught us. I experienced joy in serving up Pancit, Bibimbap bowls, Butter Chicken, Pizzelles and Pumpkin tiramisu - all the while sharing the stories of how these foods connect to my family. 
I remembered one of my favorite stories in the Bible after the resurrection of Christ. Jesus appears by the Sea of Galilee where his disciples were together. The group heads out to fish, but they don’t catch anything. 
The next morning Jesus is standing on the shore waiting for them. He calls out, “Friends, haven’t you any fish?”
They answer no. 
He urges the to cast their nets on the right sight of the boat. The result is a catch of 153 large fish - so many that the net is torn. Jesus urges them to bring the fish for a big fish fry on the shore. “Come and have breakfast.” 
None of the disciples dared ask him, “Who are you?” They knew it was the Lord. Jesus came, took the bread and gave it to them, and did the same with the fish (John 21:11-12, NIV)
We see Jesus’s joy in serving them. He takes time to make bread and prepare fish to nourish them well and then send them out. This is the power of food and sharing a meal across the table. It’s nourishment for the body and soul.
🫶🏾 Friend, what about you? Have you ever had that experience of doing something that brought you great joy and blessed others?
{Read the full reflection here: https://open.substack.com/pub/dorinaglorygram/p/follow-the-joy-set-before-you} #foodie #food  #cookingtherapy #nourish #lovelanguage #powertothesisterhood #retreat @theopendoorsisterhood
26 4

I had a fantastic Sunday morning running the Diamond 10k! 🩵💎🦋 The weather was simply gorgeous! I could feel a cool breeze kissing my shoulders (most of the way) on the out-and-back course from the San Joaquin River Parkway Conservatory. My hubby Shawn was the race announcer. The runners got to cross the finish line under a chandelier and sparkly sun rays.

This is one of my fave races because of all the phenomenal women cheering each other on, the beautiful jewelry by Endure Jewelry (instead of traditional medals), and of course, the sparkly donuts. 🍩 🏃🏽‍♀️My friend and race director @sunny.runs always has every detail dialed in to make it a beautiful & community-oriented event! After a long week, this was definitely the breath of fresh air and reset I needed!

#glorychasers #walkrunsoar #eatprayrun #runningmotivation #running #runhappy

View

Sep 18

Open
I had a fantastic Sunday morning running the Diamond 10k! 🩵💎🦋 The weather was simply gorgeous! I could feel a cool breeze kissing my shoulders (most of the way) on the out-and-back course from the San Joaquin River Parkway Conservatory. My hubby Shawn was the race announcer. The runners got to cross the finish line under a chandelier and sparkly sun rays. 
This is one of my fave races because of all the phenomenal women cheering each other on, the beautiful jewelry by Endure Jewelry (instead of traditional medals), and of course, the sparkly donuts. 🍩 🏃🏽‍♀️My friend and race director @sunny.runs always has every detail dialed in to make it a beautiful & community-oriented event! After a long week, this was definitely the breath of fresh air and reset I needed! 
#glorychasers #walkrunsoar #eatprayrun #runningmotivation #running #runhappy
47 2

It was truly my joy to
design, cook, and serve up
11 meals
Over 5 days
Taking 13 women on a
World tour.
Nourishing souls.
Telling stories
through food.

#foodiefriday

View

Sep 16

Open
It was truly my joy to
design, cook, and serve up
11 meals
Over 5 days
Taking 13 women on a 
World tour.
Nourishing souls.
Telling stories
through food. 
#foodiefriday
31 4

📖 Join me today for a verse-by-verse reading and unpacking of one of my favorite psalms! Psalm 139 is a reminder that we are known by God and He is always with us.

Maybe you are feeling lonely today. Maybe you are wondering if He really cares about your grieving heart or sees you in the waiting. These honest and passionate words from David are a honey-sweet reminder that we are never alone.

I personally love thinking about God with knitting 🧶 needles designing and knitting each of us together in our mama’s womb. I love thinking about how with thread and needle 🪡 He hems me in.

🫶🏾What was your fave verse or image from Psalm 139?

#psalm #biblestudy #versebyverse #david #fearfullyandwonderfullymade #knitting #bibleverse #psalms

View

Sep 15

Open
📖 Join me today for a verse-by-verse reading and unpacking of one of my favorite psalms! Psalm 139 is a reminder that we are known by God and He is always with us.
Maybe you are feeling lonely today. Maybe you are wondering if He really cares about your grieving heart or sees you in the waiting. These honest and passionate words from David are a honey-sweet reminder that we are never alone.
I personally love thinking about God with knitting 🧶 needles designing and knitting each of us together in our mama’s womb. I love thinking about how with thread and needle 🪡 He hems me in. 
🫶🏾What was your fave verse or image from Psalm 139?
#psalm #biblestudy #versebyverse #david #fearfullyandwonderfullymade #knitting #bibleverse #psalms
20 6
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